*dusts off PR.net t-shirt*
*cues up Bad Brains vinyl to properly create sense of elitism*
*puts on reviewer hat - hey, wait, this says Carvin... nevermind*
Even though Avril Lavigne is hardly punk rock, we certainly reviewed our fair share of borderline music back in the day. Unfortunately, as I'm pressed for time right now, I'm afraid this review won't be that much better than a couple others PunkROCKS.net featured spanning the entire range of musical quality from terrible to amazing. In any case, I'm going to pull out a couple age old adages on this one:
1) A picture is worth a thousand words
2) Someone else has already said it better
So, without further ado, here is Mr. Rob Dobi's opinion on the subject. I can't find this on his site anymore (I'm glad I downloaded it years ago). So, Rob, if you don't want this posted here either, just shoot me an email.
So, what do I think of Avril? I think she's cute. I think her music is catchy. I think the lyrics are devoid of any real meaning. Her look is just "bad girl" enough while still being non-threatening. In short, she's a poster child for over-produced watered-down pop music. I don't know her personally, but from brief snippets of interviews I've seen in magazines, she didn't know crap about punk or rock until her bandmates played songs for her on tour. I've read she wants to write more of her own music and have more creative control. Yeah, good luck with that. As for her current single, "Girlfriend," I can't possibly be the only one confused about the fact that she's still writing teeny-bop pop songs about getting the guy when she's already married. Oh wait, someone in a studio back room somewhere wearing a suit wrote that song. Nevermind. Still, it's damn infectious. And at least she plays both girls in her video. Although that brings to mind a few other questions - why is she excited about getting the guy into a bathroom stall? That's just gross. Why can't she ever hold onto a guitar for more than one shot? Does she even play a guitar or is it just another part of her image? Finally, what's with the weird tempo change and the happy-snappy-clappy n*sync style group dancing and the club-style grinding all occuring at once? It's just a very confused set of imagery. Okay, I lied, one more question: is she implying we should only date people who dress the same as ourselves? I mean, sure, I'm a musical elitist, but I'm going to throw you over to Rob again on this one. Emily and I would never be getting married if I had tried to make things work with Skye or that 4-foot tall girl at Furnace Fest in a Hatebreed jersey simply because we had all the same tastes in clothing. Maybe I'm just not shallow enough to appreciate these sorts of things? As for the song's lyrical content, there's the numerous thinly-veiled references to sex, implying that she'll put out if you date her instead of the other girl. Plus you have to love the overly calculated "and hell yeah I'm the mother fucking princess" line. I know, let's throw in a naughty word, but only the one instance, and we'll kinda stick it in the middle of the song where everyone will notice but not really make a big deal about it. Pure genius. I applaud you Mr. Ghostwriter! I think I've kind of lost any point I was trying to make here. Just like a real olde-tyme PR.net review! Verdict: Catchy music, cute girl (even if she's a traitorous Canadian), vapid lyrics. This is one of those songs I'll never admit to liking, but for some reason it'll be on my iPod (it's not, don't bother checking) and have as many plays as "Shark Ethic." I can't help it, okay? The damn thing gets stuck in your head and you've just got to listen to it again and again and again. Mission accomplised RCA (except not really since I have yet to give you cent one for this song/record)!